Wednesday, August 31, 2005

new bed...

so for those of you who are keeping up with my kachito chapter i thought i would share that i got him a new bed. he was just not liking the old little one...i don't know why. anyway, this one is round a little bigger then other one...maybe the other one was too small...and it's also softer. i didn't even have to put catnip in this one. it was really cute. i get home and take it out for him and tell him "look what i got you kachis!!" i put it on the floor next to my bedroom door and i pretend like i'm walking away. i thought he was going to follow me like he usually does but he didn't. he walked around the little bed, sniffed it a few times and then jumped in!!! you should have seen the smile on my face!!!! i got so excited and i yelled "i'm so proud of you kachito!!!" so he jumped out but then did the same thing again....walked around it, sniffed it and then jumped in. he looks so cute and comfortable in his new little bed. AND yes i keep getting him new toys. i am using his old little bed as his toy box..hheehhehehehe. i don't know why i didn't get me a kachito before. my friends...the ones that are cat owners...keep telling me that i need to get him a partner now. yeah i don't think that will happen any time soon. could you imagine having two spoiled little kitties?!?!?!? hmmmm? nope!! get that thought out of your head!!buuut...if that thought doesn't leave my head what should i get a boy kitty or a girl kitty? hmmm? i think i would want a girl kitty. i would name her Luna..mi kachito y luna...hmmm? kachito de luna!!! hehehehe...no!!! thought get out of my head!!!

my own world...

have you ever had one of those days where your body is on earth but your mind is somewhere in your own made up planet? that's me all this week. one of my sisters is having marital problems and well it's effecting the rest of the family due to the severity of the problem...the problem you are asking? THE HUSBAND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! he is your typical mexican machista!!! he is not allowing her to speak to her family and WE are not allowed to go see her...otherwise she gets it!! having been in a similar situation i've tried to talk to her but have been unsuccessful. i've told the rest of my family there is really nothing WE can do until SHE decides to do something. Anyway, this is MY venting space therefore i don't want to talke about her...i love her but i also need to take care of myself. this is my time and space!!! damn it!! My head feels like it's ready to explode!!! i haven't been able to sleep all week!!! AND i really don't want to be at working dealing with somebody elses crap when i should be doing more for my sister!!! i feel helpless!! in my head the words "don't be so afraid!!!" keep roaming around. i want to go out in the middle of anywhere and just scream!!!!! nothing in particular. just SCREAM!!!!! i'm so frustrated!!!! i feel useless!!! i lost it yesterday at work. i mean estaba llorando con unos llantos que hasta yo misma me asuste!! i have never done that work. i try to leave all my personal crap at home but yesterday afternoon after talking to my sister and hearing her cry and her voice sounding so desparate i completely lost it. of course, not while i was talking her. that's another thing, because I'M the freaking social worker my ENTIRE family runs to ME to make everything better. i have dealt with all of my nieces and nephews and i can handle that but not this...not this!!! i get soooo angry when it comes to domestic violence issues....ANGRY!!!!! especially cuando los cabrones put the kids in the middle of it!!! the kids have nothing to do with the issues that the parents need to take care of...which is what i have tried telling my sister. "el idiota has issues and those are ALL HIS issues not your issues, not your kids issues so do not let him pull you in!!!" but do you think she listens to me? NOOOO!!! i guess...as i sigh...i understand her because as i've said before i've been there...feeling scared, not wanting to do anything else because you don't want to make things worse for yourself. these moments were the moments in which i went into my own little world. where nobody could touch me and hurt me. where i could say anything i wanted and not be yelled or critiziced for it. where i could be own person...i hope my sister has found a world of her own as she tries to survive is horrible horrible ordeal. thanks for letting me vent!!! i needed that.

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

"you're the coolest tia ever!!"

Those were the words spoken by my eight nieces and nephews last night on there way back home. You see i have an annual sleepover at my place for them. It started out with only two of my nephews and then came my niece and then another niece and well all together i have 14 nieces and nephews. However the only kids that spend the night with me are the the ones that are old enough to shower themselves. I keep thinking about the year that all 14 of them are able to that!!!! I don't know if the annual sleepovers at tia sonrisa's will continue. I was so exhausted by the time i took them all back to their parents last night!!! I usually have them over on a weekend but since all my weekends were full i decided to take monday and tuesday off to have them over. We went to the beach, had hot dogs, burgers and pizza. We watched movies...shrek 2, batman (the cartoon) and lord of the rings (they "can't wait for next years sleepover to watch the second part!!!"...i thought that was cute). We made pinatas!! they had so much fun doing that. AND they played with Kachito. Boy did they love Kachis!!! my poor kachis was all pooped out by the middle of the day!!

My family thinks i'm crazy to have these sleepovers...hhmm? they may be right...but i have fun having them over. it's funny actually because the older one's think they are too old to be around the parents and the younger ones feel all grown up to be away from there parents. you should here the conversation they have!!! i just want to laugh but i keep my cool and just continue talking to them trying to keep a straight face. I love them all!!! the cutest thing for me was when we were catching the bus. the youngest one...6 years old...was in front of all them and i called him to come with me, "baby" and they ALL turn around. you see i call them all babies. so when i called the 6 year old they all thought i was talking to them... you had to be there, i guess. ooohh, i just rembered something else. when we got to my place, i grabbed Kachito and started asking him "who's my baby?, who's my baby?" and all my nieces and nephews yell "ME!!!", that was cute too. I tell them that they will forever be my babies, yes even when they are 30 years they will still be my babies... i just hope they still continue to think i am the coolest tia ever!!

Wednesday, August 17, 2005

an admirer?...

So i was sitting at my desk completing some paperwork for a client that was coming in at 2:00 in the afternoon when my phone rings...it was the receptionist. it was a little bit before 2 and i thought "hmm? my client is early". She tells me "you have a special delivery"... a special delivery? what? que? como? for me? "did i order something for kachito and forgot about it?" so i walk over to the receptionist area and i see these beautiful flowers...pink roses in a pink vase wrapped around in pink ribbon!!! beautiful!!!! "that can't be for me?" "they sure are!!" said the receptionist. Oh my!!!! as i was opening the card attached to them i was thinking "oh that is really sweet of Frank"...the papa that stopped by to pick up his daughter's cell phone that i had found. To my surprise they weren't from him. I have no idea who sent me the flowers. the card read "i say a little prayer for you everyday and I'm always thinking of you". I was really happy to get them but also freaked out because there are so many wierd people out there. anyway, the flowers are beautiful and thank you to whom ever sent them to me. i will enjoy them as long as they live :-)

Monday, August 15, 2005

good deed of the day...

i started dogsitting for new clients this weekend. the dogs are the cutest little puggs ever...lucy and albert!! but oh my god are they a handful!! lucy is the hyper one, "play with me!! i want to play!! now!! play with me!!" is what she would probably be saying if she could talk. Albert on the hand is more like "i'm too cool to be playing with you!! leave me alone!! let me be!!" AND yet keeps pushing lucy away so lucy thinks he is actually playing with her. Anyway, yesterday afternoon as i was walking them i found a cell phone. So i started thinking about what to do with it, who am i going to give it to? could i use another cell phone? all these thoughts were going through my head. it's a really nice cell phone too, esos con camara y todo la cosa. i'm way home this morning...back to kamichito, oh how i missed him!!...i kept thinking about what to do about this cell phone. so when i got home, i saw that "papa" had called all night, it got me thinking about my daddy and how worried he would get if i kept not picking up his phone calls. so the overly cautious person that i am i decided to call "papa" from work. I didn't want to call from my home phone or my cell phone...you just never know. So i called and an answering machine picked up and said "you have reached Frank please leave a message and i will get back to you" so i did. I said "hi Frank my name is sonrisa, i am calling regarding a lost cell phone. i found it yesterday afternoon at the corner of greenleaf and ashland and noticed that you have called a few times so i was just wondering if maybe you would like to notify the owner that he or she could contact me at work so that he or she could come and pick it up". Within half an hour Frank called and told me that it was his daughters phone and she had indeed lost it yesterday. He told me that he appreciated me calling him and that he was actually surprised because there aren't many people that would have called to return the cell phone. He is too come and pick up the cell phone this afternoon. I'm feeling pretty good at the moment.

Tuesday, August 09, 2005

relationships...

So i started writing about how i didn't want to be in a relationship and the reasons why i didn't want to be in a relationship. i ended up not finishing it so i decided to save it and continue it today BUT a friend of mine called me last night and we started talking about the subject and told me "you sound bitter!" so i decided to delete that blog and start all over again so here goes...BITTER ME?!?!?!?!? just because my heart got broken once and can't seem to get over it...it's been 5 years... doesn't make me bitter. does it? ok so maybe it does. i've dated a few guys but ALWAYS seem to find something wrong with them so i stop dating them. i just don't trust any guys anymore!!! yeah that does sound bitter...doesn't it? thanks alot my canadian friend for making me realize how bitter i am!!!! so anyway, i told him "well i vow to work on it so from here on i will try my best to not think negatively about a man that wants to date me. hmmm? i just thought about something...maybe me being picky means that i know what i want and don't want to waste anybody's time?" Well my canadian friends answer to that was that i wasn't being picky at all, i was "protecting" myself from possibly getting hurt again and that if i continue doing that i might just pass on an opportunity to be in a healthy relationship with a great guy. So i take care of myself, what's wrong with that? nobody else is going to!! AND why do i really want to be in a relationship when almost everybody i know is ALWAYS bitching about their partners...."hay quien la intiende?!?!, hay ya no lo aguanto!!!, sonrisa you have it so good!!" after hearing that, really why be in a relationship? okay sometimes i wish i had someone to come home to...actually now i have kachito so there i took care of that...or sometimes i wish i had someone to go see that romantic movie with and not leaving the theatre wanting to be with someone special because hey that special someone is with me...hmm? maybe i could sneak kachito in with me, ehhehehehe. hmmm? I AM BITTER!!!!! okay not all my friends are bitching about their partners. i actually have a few who are in decent respectable relationships but to be honest those are very few compared to the ones that are in an unhealthy relationship. i will keep my healthy relationshipped (so i made up this word) friends in mind when i date another person. I will take a deep breath and say "BITTERNESS salte de mi!!!" BITTERNESS salte de mi!!!" when that will happen not sure because i don't want to date for a while...gotta work on me accepting that i am bitter first..hehehehee

Friday, August 05, 2005

thanks bloggers :-)

Why? for the wonderful responses!!! Last night i bought my Kachito a new toy and was kind of feeling guilty because i had also just switched the litter...according to the ad "the best for your cat!". Anyway, for some reason he loves glittery things and so i bought him a few of those glittery tiny balls. At one point i started to think 'hmmm? maybe i am spoiling you kachito?" but i started thinking about what you guys had said and i started feeling better...maybe i was just looking for an excuse to make myself better whatever it was it worked.

I'll be going to Market Days this weekend...i hope it's not too hot to be walking around. My sister is coming with me...she makes me laugh because she STILL freaks out when she sees two individuals of the same sex kissing or holding hands. According to her "it will take some time for me to take use to"... oh well que le vamos hacer. I sometimes get a little nervous going to these things because i always end up seeing most of my clients...which is cool and all but then my friends end up asking me "so how do you know that person?" i usually try to pretend i didn't hear them and change the conversation but sometimes they continue to ask. so what do i tell them? "you know i don't really remember, i've know him/her for quite some time that i forgot".

anywho, need to get back to my job. have a great weekend you all!!!!

Tuesday, August 02, 2005

i'm spoiling him?!?!?!?!

So i love my Kachito!!! i've been told i have been spoiling him. i don't think i am...so i got him a 90 dollar litter box. what's so wrong with me wanting him to be comfortable?....we ALL like to be comfortable!! so i keep getting him toys everytime i go to the store...who doesn't like to be remembered when you're at the store? i have no one special in my life at the moment so my Kachito will continue to be spoiled...even if i had someone in my life i would still spoil him!! so sometimes i go overboard but hey if i can do it why not?!?!?

i just got a phone call from one of the ladies i dogsit for. She told me my Pepper died!!! Pepper was a cocker spaniel, a beautiful one at that. she was so affectionate and lovable and huggable and a great doggie!!!! i've known her for 5 yrs!!! I hope she is a much better place. I used to spoil pepper too...i'm going to miss her alot!! isn't it ironic. I was just writing about how happy i am with Kachito and now i am in tears because Pepper passed away. I need to stop writing and focus on my work because i don't want people thinking i'm stupid for crying over a dog...