Sunday, January 04, 2009

can't sleep...

I once again cant sleep...its 10 minutes to 2 a.m...therefore I decided to blog. About what? not sure, but I'm sure something will come to mind. By the way, HAPPY NEW YEAR AND ALL THAT CRAP!! ;-)

Okay so I will write about what has motivated me to loose weight (which by the way has nothing to do with the "new years resolution" crap). I am ashamed and embarrassed to even write about it but I have to!! I just have to so it stops bugging me!! Let me start by saying that it is very very vain on my part...this is where the ashamed and embarrassing part comes in. I knowI don't have a nice body or am at all that pretty but a few days ago I was watching t.v. and i saw an overweight half naked guy. I was not all impressed...mind you I find chubby people very attractive. One of the girls started criticizing the guy...which was totally mean by the way...on his appearance. I usually let these things go, mostly because the girls tend to be mean bitches without a heart but this time it hit a nerve!!! I am at my heaviest weight right now and I just can't believe I allowed that to happen. Santis tells me I look beautiful no matter what...he is very very good for my ego... and that I am making a big deal over nothing. But I started thinking, "I don't want people saying those things about me" Like I said before I usually don't let things like this get to me but for some reason this freakin' show upset me!!! I even told myself, "Sonrisa, you MUST be pms-ing!!!" to try to calm myself down. It hasn't been helping. So anywho, now every time I'm thinking of eating something fattening I tell myself "do you want to be that overweight half naked girl that everyone criticized"...in my revised version the guy turned into a girl. I'm sure in a few weeks I'll be back to my "who gives a fuck!?!!?" attitude which I'm sure Santis will totally appreciate!! For now though, I MUST try to loose some weight...

3 comments:

Chanclita Divina said...

wait. its blue here. it used to be green verdad? when did you swith it up?

i just got through seeing oprah and she almost made me cry. its about balance sonrisa--well at least for me and o. it boils down to balance, self love and not blaming the potato chips. ugh....

sonrisa morena said...

i changed the color a few months ago chanclita. i missed that show but i do think its all about balance as well. AND last time i went to the doc she checked my thyroid because she did notice i was gaining some weight. all came out okay though

Hapi said...

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