Wednesday, May 14, 2008

i don't have a titel for this post. The very last post i wrote was about something wonderful that happened. I had found out I was pregnant. I really wanted to share this with everybody but i was told to wait after the three months. I waited and i have sad news...this past Friday I had a miscarriage. It has been the saddest day of my life. i'm at home not wanting to talk to anyone or see anyone...i'm sorry for not returning phone calls or replying to texts. i really just don't want to feel or think. thinking is the worst part... there are soooo many thoughts and questions going through my head. i know the answers but i just cant seem to comprehend them. "i just wanted to be a mommy", "why doesnt somebody want me to be a mommy?", "ni para eso sirvo!!"...i can't stop thinking these things. i took two weeks off from work but to be honest i really dont want to go back. i know and understand i'm not the only one that has gone or will go through this but i really just want to stay in bed and not feel...

4 comments:

Coco said...

i'm sorry that you miscarried...
please make an appt with a therapist/counselor- someone with whom you can talk about your thoughts and feelings.
LOVE yourself!! be NICE to yourself!! Take Care!!

fuertes y calurosos abrazos, amiga!

bendiciones.

Joel said...

I've been through that once, but of course, I wasn't the one carrying the baby, only the father to be. Regardless is was incredibly difficult for me. I have no advice or wisdom other than to say, "just hang in there"... I know it's an awful cliche but I've found it to be the answer to just about every challenging time in my life.

yournamehere said...

I'm sorry this happened to such a sweet person as yourself. Take care of yourself, dear.

Santiago said...

Simplemente te quiero mucho.